Movement

My job recently moved me from one campus to another in the opposite direction from my house (although roughly equidistant, just a couple of miles closer). My initial reaction to change is often a snap of resistance, but for this move, as soon as I was told, I was like, "All right! Awesome, I'm on board."

My second thought was, "Oh no, Trader Joe's!"

See, my old location was nearly right next to the only Trader Joe's in our immediate area. It was ideal and convenient; I could always just pop in to pick things up for dinner or really good produce for the week. The hubby loves their tea and their "Just the Clusters" cereal.

Now? Now I'm in the middle of a shopping wasteland. There is nothing nearby enough to be convenient.

But that truly is one of the only two significant downsides to this move. The other is that I miss my coworkers from the other location. There are really great people there who I honestly looked forward to seeing every day. How often can you say that about a job? If you can, consider yourself lucky.

But it's not that there aren't good people at the new location. There are - it's just such a different setup so I don't actually get to see them. My old location was small - one building. You saw everyone, all day. Now I'm on more of a traditional campus with more buildings and people spread out all over. It's going to take a lot more effort here to connect with people and build relationships, but that said, I'm up for the challenge.

One thing that's different but cool is that I simply get to move around a lot more. To get to the ladies' room, I have to go downstairs and to the other side of the building (this is how my phone took a tumble on Wednesday). To get coffee or use a microwave, I have to go to another building. To visit classes and talk to them about the tutoring center, I have to go to different buildings. Every day, I have reason to get up and move a bunch of times - something I didn't have before. I like it (especially since it's not winter so going outside doesn't require a coat).

Another change is that I have an office here. Because the space here is so much bigger, there are a few computer labs and several offices, of which I am occupying one. It's just... nice. Nice to have a little breathing room and mental space to concentrate on the various projects I have to do now as a part of my job.

I may not be at this location for more than a few months (it's unclear if I'm staying here or moving back) but I'm enjoying it while it lasts. Now if only they could build a Trader Joe's on campus...

An odd one

Today is an odd day. The hubby took Nate to his mom's house early this morning, but I didn't have to be at work until noon so I basically had four hours to myself this morning. I don't even know when the last time was that I had four hours to myself. It could quite literally be two years ago.

So what did I do? I wondered what I could do. I could clean the bathroom, vacuum my bedroom carpet, clean the kitchen and dining room floors, go to the library and read. But in the end I decided I actually didn't want to do anything that resembled work or was out of the ordinary. I wanted to take this out of the ordinary time and do something very ordinary with it. I made myself breakfast, watched TV, took my time getting ready, and ran an errand before work. That's it. Didn't clean, didn't prep dinner, didn't even finish the laundry that was already in the dryer. Just kind of existed in the eeriest quiet I've felt in my home since we've lived there.

I've had plenty of relative alone time there, time when the hubby was out, Nate was asleep, and my brother was in his room. But even then, there's this energy of other people being home. On those nights I kind of trick myself into thinking I have the time to myself, but I don't really. Nate could wake up at any moment and need comforting (this almost never happens, but the possibility is there). My brother could come out into the kitchen for some water and strike up a conversation (this almost always happens).

Today it was just me... well, and the two dogs, who also seemed to relish being home and uncaged. They simply napped in their favorite cushy spots until it was time for me to leave, when they then dutifully entered their crates.

And now today, a day that many people experience as one in which they get out early from work, I have to work late. As with most Wednesdays, I have to proctor an exam, but unlike most Wednesdays, today's may be packed. I usually only have three to five students testing. Today there are twelve scheduled. I may, in fact, work later today than I usually do, depending on how quickly the students move through the exam.

And then there's the matter of tomorrow: Thanksgiving (here in the U.S.). I don't have anything to do in preparation. I was told we don't need to bring anything (and, truthfully, can't afford the excess groceries making something special would require) so... we're just showing up to eat. And.... that's it. It's been years since I've done that.

It's truly an odd day. Here are these things that set me free, from a certain perspective. Nothing to do this morning, nothing to prepare for tomorrow. Yet I am sort of not liking either experience. Well, or it's taking me a while to warm up to liking them. I did actually like lying on the couch watching television this morning and eating English muffins. But I didn't like getting out of the shower to an empty, quiet house. Sure, it made getting ready a lot easier since I didn't have to sneak around hoping a certain toddler wouldn't come barreling into my room and start wrecking things... but it still just didn't feel right. And not baking something like a pie or appetizer tonight doesn't feel right either.

It seems clear that I have a new normal, one that involves a rambunctious toddler and lots of time in the kitchen. Both of these renew me and provide invaluable perspective on life, even if they both involve the occasional bouts of frustration, and even disaster. An outing to the movies last week (which I'll have to write about another time) started me thinking seriously this week about my personal time - what I do with it, how I feel about it. Today I felt progress; even though my new normal is a bit crazy, running in circles, covered in flour, I love it - and now I'm slowly beginning to take back a tiny bit of me and remembering how to enjoy that, too.

Why I love Tuesday nights

Tuesday, you see, is my Hump Day.

(For the record, I actually hate the phrase "Hump Day" but that's mainly because of all the usually dumb and gross jokes people make about the phrase. The concept itself - the day of the week that feels like once you cross it, you're closer to the end - is fine by me.)

For most people, Wednesday is Hump Day. It's the middle of the week and once you're done with it, you're closer to Friday than you are to Monday. Makes perfect sense to me. And my Wednesdays are long days; I usually go to bed late the night before and then work 9am to 8pm on Wednesday. So it's not that Wednesday is a light day.

It's just that Tuesday carries more weight. I have a short work day, and in my opinion, those are actually harder than long days. I do much better when I have a long list of stuff to do, but ten hours to do it in than a shorter or even moderate list of things to do and only a six hour day to work it all in. On Tuesday I work from 9am to 3pm and then dash into the city for grad school.

So not only do I tend to have a crunched Tuesday schedule at work, I need to be prepared for my own classes. My homework must be done and I need to be on top of any research I should have done. Up until last week, I was doing well. This week I'm a bit behind, but not in any way that's terrible. But it's a lot to juggle in my mind and after I leave school Tuesday night, I have a whole week until I need to face another Tuesday, so Wednesday always feels so much lighter.

Also, the hubby has off Wednesdays and Thursdays, so I know he's home with Nate and those are two days I don't have to worry as much about what Nate's eating, his naptime, etc. I also don't have to drive him to my mother-in-law's or worry about getting to work late or running out of work in order to pick him up and feed him dinner. In short, Wednesdays and Thursdays involve a lot less running around and mental juggling than the other days of the week and, so, heading into them after the mentally full days that Tuesdays are is always relaxing (relatively speaking, of course).

And I refuse to do any work when I get home on Tuesdays (which is usually between 9:30pm and 10pm). I eat a light dinner, catch up on a little TV, and go to bed.

... and then start the whole roller-coaster week again the next day. Wednesdays and Thursdays are lighter, but Friday, Saturday, and Sunday are all busy days, full of work and full-time parenting as the hubby works. Tuesday night between 10pm and bedtime is the closest thing I get to a little weekend and I look forward to it every week.

For what it's worth Friday

For what it's worth...

1) I like the new Facebook and I think I'll like it even more after the new "timeline" profiles become available.

2) However, I dislike Facebook overall for moments like the one I had today where I read a post and comments about partying that went on when I was in high school, naively convinced that only the "bad" students drank, not all the popular kids, all the time. Apparently I was pretty wrong. So there's hating being wrong and there's the 17 year old inside me sad about never being invited to anything ever. (And there's the sadness at recognizing at my wise old age now that it was probably because I was a prudish know-it-all. Oh, and knowing that sometimes things don't change much.)

3) I have spent the past two days working intensively on a newsletter for work and it's at the point where my right eye will NOT STOP TWITCHING. I'm hoping it stops at some point tonight.

4) I got 50% credit on my first homework assignment for grad school. So there's that.

5) R.E.M. broke up this week and I did more crying that day than I'd want to admit to most people, but I'm okay now. Still a bit sad and deflated, but okay.

6) I have gotten so many emails from my boss this week that I'm hearing phantom "pings" of new email, kind of like when Nate was an infant and I'd hear him crying when he wasn't. (That still happens sometimes, too.)

7) I feel like I'm on the edge of making some significant changes in my life/to my life. It's hard to describe, but I feel like I'm at the tipping point of a maelstrom. Some things require changing and some things I want to change, but it's feeling pretty big. I'm just hoping I have the drive and commitment to actually do it. I've been constantly thinking about this quote of the day from the other day:

"To change your life: start immediately, do it flamboyantly, no exceptions."
~William Jones

I think I want to make myself a little card of that and put it in my wallet because, really... Self - start NOW, do it! No exceptions! Isn't that what we all need to tell ourselves sometimes?

Am I making any sense? I'm feeling a little crazy lately.

And my eye is still twitching.

But I hope you have a lovely weekend.

Not quite done with the fun...

Day 27

I tried a new recipe: lasagna rollatini (no pictures because it just doesn't photograph well, but trust me it is yummy). This is my weekend thing now - Nate naps, I bake/cook for the next couple of days. It works out well. This recipe was particularly fun because I wasn't sure I could successfully roll lasagna without having it all break or having the cheese ooze out the sides - but I made it work!

Day 28

I tried a new (to me) chocolate chip cookie recipe. It involves a little more work than any other recipe I've tried (there's a whole "whisk and wait three times" part) but, man, are they delicious. I can see why this recipe is so popular. AND it uses melted (browned) butter, which means if you're like me and always forget to leave the butter out to soften, it doesn't matter!

Day 29

I taped students together for a "human caterpillar" leadership exercise. Nothing quite gets any educator work-related tension out like taping students together and then laughing at them for half an hour.

Tomorrow... Day 30!!!