Yesterday was my niece Brooke's baptism and, appropriately enough, I think she looked like an angel:

Could she be any more precious??

And, to boot, she behaves like an angel.  She did not make a peep the whole day.  My sister said she sometimes scrunches her face up like she's going to cry and then she rethinks it and is fine (I saw her do this once yesterday at lunch, and that was it).  It's amazing what a contrast she is to TJ, who has never hesitated to let you know exactly how he's feeling every moment of the day.

Although, appearance-wise, I am continually struck by how much they look alike.  (Okay, okay, I know - they're siblings - but they just look SO much alike and genetics is utterly fascinating to me.)  This is TJ at his baptism a year and a half ago:

At the same age (both about 3 months in each photo), they look like twins to me. And, just for good measure, this is TJ now (well, yesterday) with my dad:

That picture makes me melt.  TJ loves his Pop-Pop, who loves him back even more.  We're having a bit of tough times in my family right now - nothing I can really ever write about here (which, for me, makes it even harder because this is where I come to process things a lot of the time) - but TJ is the constant shining light of joy in all of our lives.

Okay . . . *wipes tears* So anyway...

As I look at TJ and Brooke and they so clearly look like the other kids in our family, I can't help but wonder what our child will look like.

The hubby, me, and Brooke
(And, no, I don't know what that face is I'm making; I'm probably talking.  I'm always talking.)

Naturally, the talk of the day yesterday was babies.  Brooke wasn't the only baby in attendance and there were a lot of other kids around, mostly under the age of six.  This was also the first time I've seen a lot of family friends since I've been pregnant (I wasn't kidding when I said I didn't get to see friends that often) so there was a lot of "How are you feeling?"

A LOT of "How are you feeling?" Like, I think every single person in attendance asked me that.  Before I was pregnant, I don't think I realized that that's "the thing" to ask pregnant women, but I suppose it is.

So it was a lot of, "I feel great!  No, really, great!  Yeah, never any morning sickness.  No, not really many aches or pains.  Yeah, basically my nose is kind of stuffy - so, yeah, I feel great!" I kind of felt bad about it after a while, like people were looking for something worse.  Especially when they'd say, "Well, it is still early, you have a while to go" and I'd say, "Yeah, four months to go!"  And their face would blink a smidge and they'd say, "Four months?  Really?  Wow, that went fast!" and then, inevitably, they'd look down to my stomach.

Seriously?  I had to laugh about it and am even chuckling about it right now.  (Ah, yes, a good blog post brings both tears and laughter.)  And, I am happy to announce that I had my first "uninvited tummy touching" yesterday!  We showed up to church and my aunt promptly put her hand on my belly and asked - you guessed it - how I was feeling.  The funny thing is I didn't even realize it at the time and, in truth, it didn't bother me!  I always, always thought I'd be one of those, "Please do NOT touch me" pregnant women because I'm not a very touchy-feely person at all - but now that it happened, it didn't even faze me.  So, go figure, yet another prediction I had about my own pregnancy that ended up being completely and utterly wrong.  I clearly have no idea what I'm talking about.

One of R.E.M.'s most famous songs is, of course, "It's the End of the World as We Know It (and I feel fine)."  When they perform this in concert, Stipe really yells the "And I feel fine" part at the second and third choruses... so, of course, so do I (because, at R.E.M. concerts I sing along as if I think I'm auditioning for co-lead singer).  Once I yelled it so loudly and with such force that I almost passed out because I totally winded myself.  I think I actually expelled 97% of the air that was in my lungs.  But, after a few seconds - wait for it - I felt fine.  (Har, har.)

So when someone asks me how I feel, that's what I think of now.  I FEEL FIIIIIIIIIINE!  Let's hope it stays that way.

Note: all photos by my friend Kate, who is basically our official family photographer

Oh, hai blog, how's it going?  Say hi to your mother for me.

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday weekend, whether you celebrate Christmas or not.  Something about it this year was just off for me (the hubby expressed this, too) and we both woke up a bit sad Christmas morning because we didn't have gifts to exchange with each other.  We both know that's not the point and not really a big deal, but it was our first Christmas living together on our own (last year we were living at my parents' house) and gifts would have been a sweet addition - but we just love having those days where we get to wake up together because they're rare, so that was quite a gift in itself.  (I usually leave for work before he's even awake.)

We spent Christmas Eve with my family and Christmas Day with his family.  Then yesterday we went to NY state to visit my grandmother, Baba, so she could meet my sister's newborn, Brooke, Baba's great-grandaughter.

happy Brooke (will be two months old this Wednesday)

Here's the thing you have to know about Baba: she is a fountain of folk wisdom.  She grew up in the Ukraine and never went to school a day in her life (because at that time, in that place, girls were raised to work the farm, get married, and have babies - what would you need any schooling for).  But she turns out to be really, really - like uncannily - right at times.  She theorized once that "everyone has cancer" and that it just depends on who it "comes out" in.  Years later, I read a NY Times article about a group of research scientists who had just concluded the same thing.  Because things like this happen all the time, no one in the family was surprised - just amused.

There are several people in my family who I think could have done amazing things had they had the proper education and motivating influences.  I think part of the reason I push myself to keep working and learning and achieving is so I can honor these family members who worked so hard so I can live the life I do - so I can give credit to all they may have done.

Four generations: Mom, Baba, my sister (with TJ), me (with Brooke)

So when Baba asked me when we find out what we're having and I said probably this Wednesday (if the baby cooperates) and she said my mom told her I felt the baby move (which is true - I think I have a little) and wanted to know what side I felt it on, I knew why.  Left side movement: girl.  Right side movement: boy.  (By the way, it's left . . . so we'll see.  My sister also did the "necklace test" and it came out as two girls - meaning I'll have this girl and then another - so, again, we'll see!)

But that was it.  Everyone was like, "Okay, we thought it's probably going to be a girl and Baba says it will be so, yeah, it's probably a girl."  The hubby said we didn't need a sonogram because we had a Baba-gram.

We'll see if she's right but I wonder why I'm even wondering.  From the beginning I've had a hunch toward girl.  Whenever I talk about the baby, I automatically use female pronouns and have to stop myself to say "he or she."  And now we've had the Baba-gram, so what more do we need?

Okay, so we do have that official 20 week sonogram on Wednesday since they have to check out many other things besides the sex (and, besides, it could be a boy - and I'll be 100% thrilled either way).  I'm looking forward to the rest of the tests, too, because I just worry . . . daily . . . even though Baba told me I look great so that means everything is perfect.

How can you not totally love and trust a grandmother that lets her one year old great-grandson jump on the bed with his boots on?  (With a little assist from my brother)

Families can be frustrating.  They can get to you in ways that no one else can . . . but they can also just simply get you better than anyone else.  A day without presents can bring the holiday home in ways that a mountain of beautifully wrapped packages can't.