The Beauty of Different

16. Read 30 books I haven’t read before (in addition to the above) and blog about them. (25/30)

The Beauty of Different: Observations of a Confident Misfit
by Karen Walrond

I mentioned this book in my one-day-late New Year's post.  Karen Walrond of Chookooloonks is one of my favorite bloggers and I've been dying to get this book since it came out but, of course, funds have been low so I planned to get it with a Christmas gift card (which I did). 

I was trying to describe this book and my thoughts on Karen to my dad on Sunday night and there were two key points I found myself trying to get across:

1 - For her 1,000 faces project, the results are amazing.  There has to be something about her that gets these people to relax and shine.  When I look at her face portraits, I honestly feel like I know a little bit about that person - what they must be like, what makes them laugh, what they like to eat.  I don't know how she pulls off this magic, but my guess is that it's something about her as a person that makes these folks' true selves shine through.  This brings me to...

2 - I feel like Karen is the type of person who would make you feel like you've truly exhaled for the first time in years after spending five minutes with her.  Ever have that kind of person for a friend?  My friend Mike is like that for me.  I would conclude another work week and various life activities, drive the 3+ hours to Baltimore, walk into his apartment, and within five minutes I would feel my heart rate slow and the muscles in my face relax as my entire body and being felt truly relaxed for the first time since the last time I was in Baltimore.  I think Karen must be like that.

This book brought me to tears several times because it's so compelling and inspiring.  (I even started my journal yesterday.  It's a meek start, to be sure, but it's a start.)  It reminds me of one of my favorite poems, "The Archaic Torso of Apollo" by Rainer Marie Rilke (which I previously wrote about, also during New Year's time):

Archaic Torso of Apollo
by Rainer Maria Rilke
translation by Stephen Mitchell

We cannot know his legendary head
with eyes like ripening fruit. And yet his torso
is still suffused with brilliance from inside,
like a lamp, in which his gaze, now turned to low,

gleams in all its power. Otherwise
the curved breast could not dazzle you so, nor could
a smile run through the placid hips and thighs
to that dark center where procreation flared.

Otherwise this stone would seem defaced
beneath the translucent cascade of the shoulders
and would not glisten like a wild beast's fur:

would not, from all the borders of itself,
burst like a star: for here there is no place
that does not see you. You must change your life.

~~~

Obviously, what is most compelling about that poem is its closing line - and that's how I felt reading Karen's book.  "You must change your life" was like a quiet drum beat throughout the entire text.

This book (and nearly everything Karen writes) makes me want to be more authentic, to figure out who I am and what I should be doing - and then go do it the best I can.  If you feel yourself in the need of inspiration (or just a really good, entertaining read with beautiful accompanying photographs), get this book.  Even if you don't think you need inspiration, go get this book.  You'll find inspiration you didn't realize you were looking for.

Community and Beauty

For Reverb 10:

December 7 – Community.  Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010?  What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?  

I joined the community of mothers/parents.  I tend to prefer not to separate the categories of "mother" and "parent" but I will admit that I have felt a special connection with other mothers this year.  It's definitely deepened my relationship with my sister (who has two children).  And there are times I just feel this connection take over my face.  The look I give a woman with a baby or struggling toddler at the store just feels different now, like the muscles of my face have the ability to emote more/better empathy that they did before.  I always felt bad for the mother/parent with the screaming baby at the store, but now I just really feel it in my heart.  Literally, I feel a tug in my chest now when I see that familiar scene.  I definitely feel like I've gained entry to a club of sorts.

The community I miss the most is the writing/poetry/publishing world.  I'm dying to attend a poetry reading or the release of a poetry journal.  Maybe in 2011 I'll find a night to do that.

December 8 - Beautifully different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different - you'll find they're what make you beautiful.

This prompt was contributed by one of my very favorite bloggers, Karen Walrond of Chookooloonks, whose book, The Beauty of Different: Observations of a Confident Misfit, is on my not-really-real Christmas list.  (If I get a Barnes and Noble gift card for Christmas, it's the book I'm buying with it.)  I've really changed my thoughts on beauty this year by really reading and thinking about the things Karen writes.

When she recently asked, "What makes you beautiful?" I responded that I'm beautiful because my husband tells me so every day and I believe him.  I don't make excuses or contradict him (usually) and instead just say thank you.  Sure, I have my off days - days where a shirt doesn't fit right and I feel fat because of it.  But, now, I do look at the shirt and say, "Okay, it's the shirt.  I haven't changed so it's not me."  I think it takes many people, especially women, a while to get to that point and it feels really good to be here.

My unique (hubby would say "lack of") sense of humor makes me different.  My inclination to love "depressing" music over anything else makes me different.  And, I'd venture to say that these two things are related.  I was a sensitive, slightly outcast, outsider-looking-in, introspective teenager and those years still resonate so strongly with who I am and continue to be.

My past makes me different and makes me beautiful because it's created how I see and enjoy the world.

Fill in the Blank Friday

1. My last haircut was a couple of months ago.  I should get one and my color done before Thanksgiving, but I'm not going to be able to afford it.

2. My most daring hair moment was a toss up between the times I cut off 13 inches in one shot or the time I had bright red hair with blond chunks in the front (a la Ginger Spice).

3. A hairstyle I'd never be brave enough to try is . . . I'm not sure.  I'm pretty brave when it comes to my hair.  I wouldn't have blue hair right now because my job wouldn't approve, but if they didn't care, I'd be brave enough to try it.  Maybe I'd never shave my head.  Yeah.

4. I've always dreamt of being a (blonde, brunette, or redhead) natural redhead.  I mean, really, who wouldn't want to be?  I have, though, been all of these things via color and each is fun in its own way.

5. My go-to hairdo is blow dried with the ends flipped up.

6. My biggest hair disaster was the 80s.  I live in NJ, I had a perm, I owned Aqua Net, and it was the 80s.  Need I say more?

7. A hairstyle I am dying to try is extensions.  I know they're expensive and totally impractical, but I would love to have healthy, full long hair and the only way I'd get that is through extensions.

8. My best hair day was my sister's wedding.  I liked my wedding hair, but I liked my hair for her wedding more.

9. The worst hairstyle I ever had was the aforementioned perm.  Bad, bad.

10. My hair is naturally a dull brown, thin (and falling out in clumps these days due to postpartum hormone drop-off), straight, and fairly slow to grow.  But it holds color wonderfully.

As always, Fill in the Blank Friday is brought to you via the little things we do.

Wearing Sunshine

While, honestly, I may prefer rainy days to sunny ones, I recognize that might not be the norm - and it doesn't mean I can't appreciate a nice sunny day sometimes.  Sometimes feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin is just what you need to turn a bad week around or create a bright mood for the day.  I'm convinced that having to take the dog for a morning walk every day when I lived alone during grad school significantly helped me keep my mood up.

And considering I tell Nate he's my sunshine, well then, I just have to like sunshine.  (I sing the "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." song to him... well, I try to - I usually can't get through the first line before I start choking up.  Sigh.)

So for those sunny days - or to brighten your mood on a cloudy day - here are some beautiful sunshine necklaces from Etsy:

earlybirdcreations

I love this one.  It's so subtle - the beads representing the sky and sun over the silver tree branch.  I want this one.

sjengraving

I don't think I'd wear this one... I'd like to think I would, but maybe I just like to think I would... but regardless, I like it and if I saw it on someone else, I'd admire it.

KonaBeadGirl

I definitely wouldn't wear this one because I don't wear gold or goldtone jewelry, but I like the design a lot.  I would definitely love to have her Wood and Turquoise Owl Necklace, even though it's a bit bold for me.

prettypeggy

While I would or wouldn't wear other necklaces, this one I'm pretty sure I couldn't wear because of the ribbing I'd take... since I'm just not Little Miss Sunshine.  But I did adore those Little Miss books when I was young and I think this necklace is really cute.

sudlow

I love this one.  Love love love.  And I love her shop, too.  This Peapod Necklace would be great for a mom.  The Cupcake Ring and the Let Them Eat Cake Necklace would be great for your favorite baker, while this Chainmail Cuff is just really awesome in general.  This Cursive Love Necklace reminds me of the keychain in the first Sex and the City film.  But her Sunshine Necklace is just particularly inspiring.

<3

I hope you're having a sunshiney day!

Cloud Necklaces

I recently watched Broken English, a 2007 film starring Parker Posey as a single woman in her thirties, living in NYC, and generally displeased with all aspects of her life.  If you like slower-paced, independent films, you'll like this.  If you only like action films or romantic comedies, this one isn't for you.

One of the best parts of the film was Parker Posey's wardrobe (don't all independent films have great styling?).  One item in particular that stood out for me was this raining cloud necklace she wore in several scenes:

The thing about independent films (well, or really any films or television shows) is that they show people of average or modest lives wearing great pieces, and then you find out those pieces are exorbitantly priced.

But this necklace is just SO me.  I believe a rainy day is just as beautiful as a sunny one (which is why the hubby calls me Eeyore sometimes) so I headed over to Etsy and typed "raining cloud necklace" into the search.

And... eureka!  What a treasure of choices!  These are my three favorites:

Wickedly Good

This one might be my favorite favorite.  It's so beautiful and unique and I love the idea that Cloud 9 can be a rain cloud.  It's very yin and yang - with the good there is always bad and that provides the balance in life.

Delicious Hobo

This one is really cool.  It's got a tribal quality to it and I love the speckled raindrop.

Asil Designs

This one is so remarkably beautiful in its subtlety.  You may not see it as a raining cloud... or you might.  Either way, it's simply beautiful.

I want all three.  I have this plan to work on my style now that I'm not pregnant anymore and don't have to worry about how things will fit - and I think these necklaces would give quite a touch of spark to any outfit.