Day 2 - T for Day Two, T for tears

Oh, Day 2. Please be done.

As expected, the daycare drop-off for Day 2 was much harder than yesterday. My little peanut clearly understood what was about to happen (i.e. Mommy and Daddy were about to abandon him for the day again) and he protested... loudly... with a lot of tears. And broke Mommy's heart.

Day 1 ended okay - just okay. He was clearly out of sorts, short on sleep (he only took a one hour nap - usually he has a one hour morning nap and two hour afternoon nap), short on food (I guess too out of sorts to eat all his food) and not knowing what was going on. The benefit to this was that he chowed down on dinner at home and was in his crib, asleep, by around 8:15 - an hour earlier than he is usually in bed.

My sister asked her daughter what Nate did at daycare yesterday and she said, "Nate. Cryin'. Okay." Aww. Nothing like a one-and-a-half year old's daily report. This is one of the pictures my sister took when she picked up her daughter from daycare after work yesterday.

He had finished his snack and was sitting in one of those chairs "whiney crying," as my sister put it. Basically, he was complaining, my poor peanut. He cried when I picked him up, but was fine once we left, until after dinner, when he got really tired and we did the whole early bedtime thing.

This morning I pretty much pushed the hubby out of the daycare and we stood outside, near an open window, listening to Nate cry. But after a few minutes, he wasn't crying anymore, so I felt a little better. He was already rubbing his eyes this morning, before we left the house, still suffering a sleep deficit from yesterday. So hopefully he made it through the morning okay, ate more of his lunch than yesterday, and is partaking of a solid afternoon nap (I'll be calling to check on him around 1pm).

I feel like today will be the worst day, but I also feel like that might be tomorrow. Nothing we can do but wait and see. The hubby and I are both off of work tomorrow; originally we had plans to go to Baltimore for the weekend, but now the hubby has to work all weekend so we're going to keep Nate in daycare tomorrow (just to keep the routine going and push the acclimation along) and enjoy a day off together - take in a matinee, go to lunch.

Tomorrow will be the first time we've been able to really do that since Nate was born. Every other time we went out, there was a babysitter (always family or friend) and thoughts about Nate's evening routine and how he'd be doing. But tomorrow? Tomorrow we'll know exactly how he's doing, what he's doing, and that he's just fine (if probably still a bit unhappy). I think tomorrow might be the first time I'll enjoy spending time with the hubby, without Nate. I know a good number of moms whose parents take their babies overnight for them, or even just for short periods during the day, but regularly. I just can't do it. I don't enjoy the time without Nate - it still feels forced. And by no stretch of the imagination can I imagine someone else watching him overnight yet. (This might be familial. I don't think my parents left me with anyone overnight until I was in middle school.)

But I think tomorrow will be different; I just feel it. And I'm really hoping the morning is a bit easier - just at least a little bit. I'm not asking for Nate to scamper off without so much as a look back (although I know that will happen some day and my heart will break in a totally different way then). I just want him to feel safe, secure, and happy when we drop him off. I know we'll get there. Just waiting.